Empathy in Negotiation?

I’m reading “Getting More” by Stuart Diamond…again.  I don’t typically read books twice, but there is usable content in this book that it is hard not to.  It’s a book about negotiation, but feels like more than that. It’s also about how we get things done together. According to Diamond, what gets in the way of working together are differing mental pictures. You can come to a negotiation, but if you don’t try to see the situation the way the other party sees it, you’ll have a hard time reaching an agreement.

Photo Credit: Sharon Sinclair

Diamond recommends ‘role reversal’ practice as a way to gain knowledge about those with whom you are trying to negotiate. It’s just another way of saying, “Put yourself in the other person’s shoes.” I’ve known some folks to bristle when you tell them to do this, but it is an invaluable exercise. I find it most interesting, oddly enough, when it comes to negotiating agreements with my kids. I try to make sure I understand their position and then see if I can repeat it back to them to make sure they know that I know where they are coming from.

Diamond argues that if you don’t show that you understand the other party’s position, the other party will get stuck in a loop and won’t come out of it. Do this early, he says. If I say, “[Son], it sounds like you’re frustrated that you’re not able to the same things as your friends. You’re worried that you won’t be able to talk to them about the same things that they’re talking about,” and I can get him to say, “That’s right” then I know I’m getting somewhere. It may take a few tries, though, because you may not understand at all the reason for his position. But that’s the point.

You really can’t help them meet their goals unless you understand their goals. Traditionally, negotiation has been about you reaching your goals at the expense of the other party. This may work once or twice, but over time you’ll find that you’re not able to make deals any more, argues Diamond. Also, you’ll suffer from a loss of credibility.

What I enjoy most about the concepts in “Getting More” is that they are counter-intuitive. Who knew that you would need so much empathy in order to engage in a successful negotiation? It’s almost like, if you want to negotiate with someone, you need to provide them a service. That service is listening. There is considerable value gifting the other party with the acknowledgement that they’re being heard. If you don’t provide that service, you’re going to get less because they’ll be crippled by an unmet need. Help them reach that goal and you’ll both get more!

Eliminating the Inefficiency of Work-in-Progress in Cybersecurity

Some time ago I read “The Goal: A Process of Ongoing Improvement” by Eliyahu M. Goldratt. My big takeaway: Work-in-Progress or WIP items slow production. As the theory goes, you can be swimming in “efficiencies”, but if you’re stumbling over excess work-in-progress inventory or you’ve ignored a bottleneck, you’re nowhere near your potential.

This is clear enough in manufacturing. But these concepts can be applied elsewhere.

Photo Credit: Kristin & Adam

Demands on IT departments are growing exponentially. As technological advances accelerate, IT professionals are required to keep up. This isn’t one area, but in several areas at once. IT pros are pursuing cutting edge analytics and at the same time pushing traditional on-prem infrastructure to the cloud; while also balancing an undercurrent of spurious applications and solutions. Not just balancing, but seeking to meet an expectation of “subject matter expert” level knowledge/expertise with each new IT initiative.

This drives inefficiencies into IT. I’ll focus on cybersecurity within IT since I’m a cybersecurity analyst.

In order to win, security teams need a system for how they arrive at priorities. Priorities reduce work-in-progress items; they also minimize bottlenecks. IT departments tend to develop rockstars who don’t do all the work, but significant amounts of work pass through them. When many projects are going on at once, rockstars become “constraints”. (See “The Phoenix Project” by Gene Kim and Kevin Behr.)  The other constraint is tools-in-progress. The tendency is to push for breadth over depth. More tools, less expertise in each tool.

When tools are viewed as 80-90% of the solution, the requirement of analysts’ time is easily overlooked. When it comes to cybersecurity, organizations can easily end up with a myriad of tools. Each of these tools becomes a work-in-progress or tool-in-progress item. Tools can add value, but if there are too many, they can actually lower the aggregate value of a team. The way to overcome this is through a highly effective system of prioritization. Knowing what to prioritize takes time. But for each tool, there if there is a sharp focus, chances creating value go up considerably.

Challenge teams to not let the perfect be the enemy of the good. Dare to set some things aside in order to arrive at critical priorities. Zero in on these priorities. They may change over time. This isn’t an issue. But if they’re changing too frequently, you’ll get stuck with a stifling inventory of work-in-progress items. Make a best-effort attempt to document this and quantify it so it doesn’t keep happening.

With a clean set of priorities and a careful reduction of WIP items, all things are possible!